One Year Ago

One year ago today, we started an otherwise ordinary Saturday morning in a big way:

Here's what I wrote in my journal that day:

POSITIVE PREGNANCY TEST!!!! I took the test as soon as I woke up, and though I meant to lay it face down and do the 5-minute-wait with Shep before we both looked at the results, it turned positive WHILE I was still peeing on it!!!! Wow, not sure what that means but I hope it’s good!!

Well, it turns out it was a good sign, and we now have an amazing little girl to prove it.  ;)  Shep and I were both a little hesitant to get our hopes up too high about the positive test after having gone through a miscarriage just a few months prior, but though fear lingered in the back of our minds we were still both excited, and cautiously optimistic, at the wonderful news.  We spent the morning together, quietly thinking about our future and daydreaming of a healthy, happy baby.

The next day we attended a family celebration -- a Christening for my cousin's baby.  It was a little tricky keeping such positive news {pun intended!} to ourselves in the presence of dozens of extended family members -- part of me wanted to shout with joy and hope from the rooftop, but it was still very early so we kept our lips sealed.  At the reception after the mass, we were sitting at our table chatting with other family members when my cousin came over and randomly handed the baby of honor to me to hold.  There must have been at least 50 other guests there, so I found it a bit ironic that of all the people there she handed ME the baby, especially given our new secret news.  My face must have turned 27 shades of red, and Shep gave me a sly grin, but luckily nobody noticed.  I remember hoping that it was a little sign from the universe that I'd soon enough be holding my own baby in my arms.  And thankfully, that's exactly what happened!

366 days ago we had no idea what our future family would look like.  Now, we can't imagine our family, or our lives, without Emily in it.  It's amazing how in a matter of just minutes {5, to take the test} and weeks {39.5, waiting for her to arrive}, life is forever changed.

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