Showing posts with label 19 weeks. Show all posts
Showing posts with label 19 weeks. Show all posts

Sunday, January 5, 2014

19 Weeks

{This post is 1 week late, but better late than never, right?!  Please excuse my tardiness and pretend I posted this on 12/29 please!}

Wow, 19 weeks!


Our baby is now the size of a mango!  According to The Bump, he or she measures about 6 inches long and weighs in at about 8.5 ounces.  In addition to developing a protective coating over the skin, called vernix caseosa, baby is also working on his or her five senses.  Nerve cells for her sense of taste, hearing, sight and smell are developing in the brain.

Symptoms I've been {in most cases still} experiencing include: dizziness/lightheadedness, gas {including the dreaded puke burps}, acid reflux, irregular bowel movements, and sciatica pains on my left side.  Not fun, but if this is what gets us a healthy baby then I'll continue to deal!

On the to-do list for this week:

  • Research/decide about using a doula
  • Research pediatricians
  • Sign up for pre-childbirth classes
  • Create a baby registry

Although a little late, Hubby and I decided to take some photos together in front of our Christmas tree, to remember this special time.  Here's one that shows my growing bump!


Since we got all gussied up for the photos, we decided to have a nice Sunday evening date together at a local steakhouse called Dino & Harry's.  Choosing meals out is always a little more involved than it used to be, since there are so many foods I need to stay away from, but we had a delicious meal together nonetheless.  It hit me though during our quite candlelit dinner that the cozy spontaneous outings for two we've so enjoyed for so many years together are only going to be feasible for a couple more months.  After that, we'll be a family of three.  I started to get really emotional at this thought, and I'll admit there were some tableside tears.

I'm really excited to be having a baby with the love of my life, honestly.  We've been "the two of us" for so long though that it's going to take some getting used to, and like many expectant couples, we're going to have to make a bunch of changes to our lives once baby arrives.  I love and live for the quiet cuddly time I get to spend one-on-one with my Hubby and I'm really, REALLY going to miss it.  I'm absolutely sure spending time together as a family of three will be amazing, and will make my heart explode with happiness.  It's just going to be different.  I guess because the first half of this pregnancy has been so filled with so many worries about losing the baby that I haven't actually spent much time thinking about what it will be like in May once he or she hopefully makes an appearance.  I guess now that we're almost at the halfway mark, the realization that our time together as a twosome is dwindling so quickly brought some mixed emotions up inside me.  I am very happy and excited about what is to come, but that doesn't mean I won't fondly remember and even miss the things we've done and shared, just the two of us.

Wednesday, July 31, 2013

Silent Tears

Source


Today would've marked the 19th week of my pregnancy.  I wonder how it would've felt to reach "the halfway mark"...

I'm nearing the point where I will have been "un-pregnant" for a longer period of time than I was pregnant.  I wonder how that will feel...

I've already been "un-pregnant" for a couple weeks longer than the period during which I knew I was in fact pregnant.  Unfortunately, if anything that fact only makes me feel worse, not better.

I also wonder if or when my brain will stop automatically calculating weekly gestation milestones each and every Wednesday...  Eventually, time will run out.  I would've never been 52 weeks pregnant even if I hadn't miscarried, so I guess this counting ritual technically can't go on much past December.

Eventually, it will be time to move on... time not to forget, but to focus on something new.  I can't imagine it but I guess that's the goal of the grieving process -- processing and accepting what has happened in order to move on.  Do I even want to move on?  Honestly, I'm not sure.  Will time heal this pain?  Only time will tell...
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